Someone is Listening.

I turned off the radio and proceeded to follow the line of cars that headed southbound out of Cache Valley. It was dark and the lights from the cars snaked through the canyon. And for a moment I became entranced by the beautiful ribbon of lights that I was now apart of. 

I am not one to sit in a car musicless- especially if I am alone. But my heart was pounding and music at that time was annoying. I drove, my mind raced and I sat there contemplating the choices that will soon come to ahead here in a matter of months. . . I have mentioned before that 2012 is going to be a big year, but never did I imagine it to be this big.

Words were forming into questions in my head. Soon they made their way from my brain to my tongue until my tongue became so swollen that I either had to spit out my thoughts or choke on them. I checked my surroundings, I was alone. I couldn't breath anymore.

My thoughts came spilling forth. But I just wasn't whispering, and I didn't feel foolish. Instead I was firm and felt bold. Originally my questions were focused to air that I was breathing- I was okay if they were just going to float away, but soon I focused them inward . . . and then I realized that my words weren't being wasted, but instead directed. Directed to the one who has never left my side. Directed and focused to the only being who I know will see me through, the one who knows what will make me happiest. Yes, these thoughts, these words were for Him.

Happy Sunday. 

truth.

It is Thursday.
I feel exhausted, and to be quite honest I don't have time to devote to this post, but I need to write this.

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is true.

I feel His love for me everyday.
My life is blessed.

I call my mom between classes at least once, if not twice, a day. I tell her all the happenings in my life. But recently our conversations have change. My perspective has changed. Love is an amazing thing and I am experiencing it on a level that before wasn't imaginable. Now, I am not talking about the man of my dreams who has swept me off my feet. . . this is not a post about my hopeless-romantic-self. This is a post about the love I feel for my sisters and the Spirit that expounds that love and directs me in caring and service.

I beam the entire time I am on the phone with my mom as I try to explain to her how I feel. My heart burns and I get excited over just the thought of my Relief Society and IWA (Institute Women's Association) Sisters.

It hasn't been easy to get to this point though.

When I pray, I pray for the Sisters.
I pray for them by name.
I pray to understand their needs. I pray to love them. I pray to serve them. I pray to know them.
They are beautiful Daughters of God.

My testimony has grown tremendously as I have applied one principle of the gospel to my life.
The principle of putting the Lord First.
Sounds simple enough. Right?

I have felt the blessing of my actions in day-to-day activities.
My memory has magnified. I give all credit to the Lord.
I am able to accomplish so much, and when I do the things of the Lord first my time multiplies.

Monday I had institute. The lesson was Scripture Study in Personal Life.
I walked in knowing I was going to be Spiritually fed.

Brother Hopkins started off:

   "I knew I had to graduate from college quickly. At the time I had three kids, two part-time jobs, and I was taking 31college credits. I had to put my trust in the Lord. I knew that if I did all that He needed of me first then He would pick of my loose-ends. There was times that I only had an hour before a test to cram. I would pray to have my mind directed, then when I would open my books it was like the words I needed to study would stand off the page. Sure enough when it came time to take the test the topics I studied where the things that were asked. And even though these were my busiest times of life, I always did well."

I left class challenged.

I was off to gain my own experience, build my testimony.

On Mondays I have an hour break between Institute and my next class, which is news writing.

News writing is my hardest class. Every Monday we are given a five point quiz on the an article that we should have read during the previous week. The class is assigned about 32 articles a week, giving me pretty bad odds if you think about it. 

You may be think, "It is only five points, what is the big deal?"

I need every point I can get in that class! Yes, I am that desperate/determined to succeed.

I had done all the required reading. I wanted to review, but didn't have the time to review everything. It was crutch time. And so I prayed.

I prayed that my mind would be open, and that I could be directed. I prayed that I could be prepared for this quiz.

As soon as I opened my eyes, I felt strongly about one of the articles. Looked through it. And went to class. I didn't doubt for one minute.

Papers were passed out among the students.

I wrote my name at the top.

The question was asked, and even though I knew it was coming I still was surprised. 

My professor asked a question concerning the article that I was prompted to review.

The lord blesses us when we put Him first.

It is a simple truth that has change my life entirely.

11:33 PM (dedicated to my IWA squad)

It is my bed time, past it actually.  About a month ago, give or take a few days, I gave myself a bed time.  For a few reasons:

1. In institute I learned that when you have more rest you are more open to receive personal revelation because you are tuned into the Spirit.
2. I have started to get up early to go to the gym to work out- I have needed to get back to a schedule.
3. Early to bed, early to rise is just healthy- look it up.

Tonight however I am awake and as the minutes pass by (it is now 11:36 PM)  I am feeling guilty for staying up so late.  I just need to write though- writing is my escape.

I had the best time tonight.  It was the last activity for my IWA (Institute Women's Association) group and we went out with a bang.  I absolutely love Mama B and all the girls that surround me while I am there.  I feel so loved and so welcome!  The Lord loves me, knows me and has put these strong girls in my life to remind me of these simple truths.  I wish I could capture those feelings in a jar and whenever I needed a little pick-me-up I could just take some out of the jar and relive it all over again.  I do know that no matter what, those girls will always be there for me.

Top 10 Favorite things of tonights activity (no particular order):

1. Mama B's AMAZING FOOD!  We had soup in bread bowls- I can't describe the marvelousness!
2. Getting to REALLY know more of my IWA sisters!  They are just so perfectly lovely!
3. Mama B's house is so charming and Spiritual.
4. Testimony and story time! (LOVED THIS PART!)
5. Baring my testimony- it was such an overwhelming feeling
6. THE SPIRIT!
7. The love and unity I felt for everyone in the room.
8. Discovery of fellow blog-buddies! 
9. Laughing!  When the Rebekah Chapter gets together we GET TOGETHER!  'nuff said!
10. Drive to Lewiston!  (We didn't get lost! AND we didn't even have to turn around once!) 

It was simply marvelous in every way.  I am going to miss my girls and Mama B.

Current time 11:40 PM.

I have been on a roller coaster of sorts the last few days.  Not necessarily a bad roller coaster, but it has had its fair share of ups and downs.  One moment I am happy, the next sad- then I am hyper and bouncing off the walls, not too long after I find myself deep and concentrated on thoughts.  I will admit I called my mom on the phone Monday evening and just cried to her (if you know me I am not much of a crier) I felt better afterwards though.  

Maybe it is because it is the end of the year.  With everything coming to a head like an ugly zit just waiting to explode with forces of puss- aka: emotion and stress.  Actually that probably has a lot to do with it.  There are other factors too of course- there has to be.

Time: 11:46 PM.

I just got off of a Facebook chat with my mom.  She asked why I was still awake.  It made me laugh a little bit because when I was living at home there is no way I would be even closed to going to bed at this time.  We talked about my night and how great IWA was.  (If you haven't picked it up already I talk to my mom nearly every day,  usually more than once- I like talking to my mama.)  We also talked about some other things  that were weighing on my mind.  My mom always has the best advice, this is what she told me:

"One thing that I know that helps is to pray about all probolems not that things 

change but the way you look at things does."

I have been taught this principle since I was little, but little reminders help.  They help so much.  

Prayer is a powerful thing.  My Heavenly Father loves me, He thinks I am beautiful.  Oh HE LOVES ME and that is all I need.  Sometimes I forget and get caught up in the craziness of the world when all that really matters is the Love that I feel from my Savior.  Simple truths are so pure and beautiful.

Ending time: 11:54 PM.

This picture really has nothing to do with anything despite give you something pretty to look at while you read my post.  I took it last summer coming home from a movie with my friend Kaden.  It makes me excited for summer sun sets!

  

I made this for my Visiting Teachies

I am going to put it in a black frame.

I hope they like it!

I like it

I am going there.

I took this picture on my phone when I was in Salt Lake City for General Conference.
The Temple means so much to me.  I have always lived pretty close to a temple, but never as close as I do now and I absolutely love it!  I have been to the temple three this week already, I just sat on the grounds and thought.  I can't wait to do baptisms for the dead next Tuesday with my IWA group.
I have a testimony that the temple is a place where I can go for relief, peace, comfort, revelation, and to feel the love of my Lord.  I can't wait until I reach the age where I can enter into the temple and make covenants with Heavenly Father.
It is simply marvelous.
It is simply true.
The Temple is simply the Lord's house.
It is the place where families can be seal together- FOREVER.
It is a heaven on earth.

"I love to see the Temple"

What a beautiful day.

I love Sundays.

I even love Fast-Sundays.

Today I have been touched.  I was humbled.  I was taught.  I absorbed.  I was humiliated. I was blessed. I was overjoyed.  I was loved.  I did love.

Finding joy in what I have right now. 

"There is no tomorrow to remember if we don't take time for today." President Monson

I am one who likes to make plans.  I spend days planning on what to do- even though I hate to admit this I like to be structured and organized when it comes to scheduling. . . I give all credit to this attribute of mine to my mother who has forever kept a daily planner.

Don't get me wrong I think it is super important to have a schedule and a plan, to always be prepared and on top of things, but sometimes we get too caught up in these calendars that we forget to live for today.

"Actively seeking happiness!"

Yesterday at women's conference President Monson did absolutely amazing!  Even by watching him enter the room on a t.v. screen I could feel the presence of the spirit.  He is a mighty warrior of the Lord. He said something that I have been processing through my head all last night and today- he quoted Mother Teresa saying, "If you judge people you have no time to love them."  I like that.  I want to always remember that.  So when I am walking down the street people watching I want to fall in love with them instead of pick them apart.  Think about it.  Love is amazing!

unfolding.

Right now I'm listening to "My Wish" by Rascal Flatts.
It reminds me of home.  It reminds me of truth and hope and all things good in life.  It reminds me that no matter what people love me and stand by me.  I like that.
Today, Sunday, these days are always beautiful days.
I'm so thankful to be alive.
To breathe in clean air, to have freedom to think and act freely, to have choices in my life.
I'm thankful for every opportunity, every blessing that I have been given.
I feel humble right now.  I have caught myself neglecting these blessings, not taking time to thank My Father in Heaven for all that he has done for me.
Right now I'm going to school four hours from home.  Only four hours, that means if I needed to I could go home and be home in one day, I could leave at any second and know that in four hours I will be surround by those who will love me unconditionally.
I have met amazing people who, even though they may not know it, have impacted my life tremendously, and I've only live here for two weeks.

I came here because it felt right.
I am a person who relies entirely on feelings I receive.  (Some may call it nerve, some say I am just silly, but I know it is the Spirit guiding me.  I've felt it.)
I knew that I needed to come to USU, but I didn't know why at the time.  I think things are starting to unfold.

Have you ever sat and watched people in the mall or at Walmart parking lot?
I do this all the time.  I sit and watch how they interact with one another, how they rush from one place to another- always on the go, always having a set destination.  I think about things like this a lot- I think about the pre-mortal life and wonder what kind of relationship I had with these people before we came here to earth.  Maybe I'm alone on this, but I think about that all the time.
Have you ever met someone and felt like you have known them your entire life?
I have, I have met people here that I feel like I know, and have known for a very long time.  It is even hard for me to remember my life with out these significant people in my life.

I know I have said this before, but I believe that the people we meet we meet for a reason and the impact that these people have on our life shape us to become the people that the Lord needs us to be to fulfill his plan.  I think about that a lot too.

I made a few goals today:

• Take some time just for silence- listen for guidance and direction
• Study more- I am doing decent, I get all my homework done.  I want to excel though- I will.
• Serve others. 
• Patience 
• Lead

Tomorrow starts week three.  It has gone by fast. 

My sister said she may come stay with me next weekend.  I really hope she will.  I miss her.

Sandi and the kids are coming too!  I'm so very excited!