Friday, August 6, 2010

sick?

I am sick and it is all my fault.
I am physically sick and I have brought it on myself. . .  I didn't catch a "bug" from anyone, nor do I have a disease that can be spread, but I'm definitely sick. . . and it isn't pleasant.
How, you may ask or Why?
Well I get what some may call anxiety- when I'm nervous, anxious, excited, stressed, or overwhelmed my body becomes ill.  (To clarify:  I am not a wimp! I hardly ever let people know my emotions let alone see them and so when I am not feeling well I pretend that everything is okay- "I'm bullet proof".)
To answer the "why" part of the question, well, there is a lot that is going to be all new to me soon, my life as I know it is going to flip and I will be living in a whole new world.  I can't believe I am that old-
There is the fact of going to college in the land of far far away, those I love are coming and going, time . . . is well passing and I catch myself wasting it all the time (I may or may not consider blogging as a waste o time. .  .)

Now for the symptoms of my sickness:
I my face broke out- AND I NEVER BREAK OUT! what is the deal with my face?  I clean it and clean it and clean it some more, but there is no major difference- stupid acne!

I have had headaches

Running nose

The chills

Sick to my stomach (diarrhea)


Not to mention I have been extremely tired.

I bring this on myself.  I shouldn't try to plan things out and to demand perfection.  I should expect change and be open to new adventures, a new life, and new friends.  I should quit worrying about the "What's next" and just let everything pan itself out. . . well at least that is what my mother said I should do.

1 comment:

Warrior Princess said...

kelsie!! this is me too!!! i read a book.....taught me to just be in the moment you're in. it's called "calming the anxious mind". WAY GOOD!